limelight inbox

[heartlands]

i will make this look nice later

Comments

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

Like - being back in the city?

Re: day 254

[audacity]

Yeah, being back. I know it hasn't been long, but you know.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

It's definitely weird. It's like...

[pauses for a minute]

I don't know if this is gonna make any sense.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

I'm listening.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

[pauses for an additional second to decide how to say this]

I don't know, it's like... I was excited to come back and have things be normal for a while, but it still doesn't feel normal. Like...

I have to keep catching myself before I say something about the Performances or the visions or anything, because nobody who hasn't been there is going to believe us. I kinda feel like I have to be on guard all the time so I don't make anyone think I've lost it by bringing stuff like that up, and it feels like there's this distance between me and everyone who lives here because of it.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

[ leans against his shoulder ]

...yeah. I've been thinking about that a lot. There's just stuff no one else gets.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

Yeah. And it's like... I mean, I know I've got all of you guys, and it's not that I want anyone else here to have to know firsthand what's it like, but...

[leans!!]

It's just weird. I guess I just have to find a way to deal with it.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

Random people on the street just don't know what it's like...to eat ramen and ice cream for five days running, and not because you're broke.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

[pauses and then laughs]

The most traumatic thing we've been through, clearly.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

It's just kind of insulting, when you're walking past the state of the art water park to get your warm meal of weird menu food.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

Insult on top of injury for sure.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

Sooooo much injury. I've literally lost track of all the dying now, which sounds kinda bad? But like.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

...Yeah. You guys keep getting it rough.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

Don't say that like you didn't die like two minutes after getting there. I remember, I was there.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

Yeah, I was also there.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

So you can agree you've also had it rough, good.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

I didn't say I hadn't in the first place...?

Re: day 254

[audacity]

Just saying, no need to "you guys" it.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

I meant your Family, who has objectively gone through it more than I have on the boat. Not in a downplaying way or anything.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

[ opens mouth to argue

closes mouth

opens mouth to argue

closes mouth

opens mouth to argue

closes...mouth............................. ]

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

Yeah.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

Might have to give you that one.

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

I promise I'm not trying to make it a competition or anything, but - yeah.

Re: day 254

[audacity]

No, I get you. I'm kinda the one that brought it up anyway.

...tried telling the parents, and they were like, "is that what the kids say nowadays?"

Re: day 254

[heartlands]

Is it bad that's somehow better than what I imagined would happen if I told anyone?